Birthday Spotlight

Where in the world?

Hello friends,

🎶 “They say it’s your birthday… Well, it’s my birthday too, yeah!” 🎶

Let’s talk about birthdays—and the awkward spotlight that often comes with them.

For introverts, being the center of attention (even for just one day) can feel… a little much. All eyes on you, people singing at you, cameras ready while you blow out candles. It’s a lot.

But here's the truth:
Being celebrated doesn’t mean you’re self-centered. It means you’re seen.

How to Embrace (Not Escape) Your Birthday:

🎈 Acknowledge the Honor
When people focus on you, it’s their way of saying, “You matter to me.” Let that truth sink in.

🎈 Shift Your Perspective
Instead of worrying how you look, try asking yourself, “What have I grown through this year?” This day marks a journey worth celebrating.

🎈 Embrace the Moment
You don’t need to perform. Just show up. Smile. Accept the love. Laugh at the goofy balloon someone picked out just for you.

🎈 Express Gratitude
A simple “Thank you—I really appreciate it” can warm hearts (and help you feel more grounded too).

Because here’s the alternative:

That no one remembers your birthday at all. And we don’t want that, do we?

So even if you’re an introvert, smile and say thank you.
You’ve lived another year. That’s a big deal.

🎥 Prefer a video? I share these tips in action right here:

💡 Want Help Navigating the Spotlight?

If unexpected attention makes your stomach turn, you're not alone.
That's why I created a practical, confidence-building course just for introverts:

🔥 From Silence to Strength: An Introvert’s Guide to Speaking Up
Now on sale for just $249 →View Course Details

You are valuable. You can speak up.

Tonya Lehman, The Speaking Confidence Coach 

Helping quiet voices speak up with confidence.

PS.  Do you know where I am?  Warsaw, Poland!  At Cafe E. Wedel - delicious!  Do you know when I am there?  You may recognize the ribbon - Armed Forces Day! 

What to Do When Extroverts Talk Over You

Hello Friends,

You finally build up the courage to speak…
And someone talks right over you.

Sound familiar?

It’s not just frustrating—it’s deflating.
But here’s the truth: your voice matters just as much as the loudest one in the room.

Next time it happens, don’t let it slide.
Wait for a natural pause, then calmly say:

👉 “I’d like to add to something you said earlier.”

This short phrase does a few powerful things:

• Reclaims your space
  

• Signals your confidence
  

• Keeps the conversation flowing with respect
  

You don’t have to interrupt to be heard.
You can assert yourself gracefully—even in a room full of talkers.

🎥 Prefer a video? I share this tip in action right here: VIDEO 

Want More Support?

💬 I work with individuals and organizations to help introverts speak up with confidence—without changing who they are.
Whether it's a keynote, a workshop, or one-on-one coaching, I’d love to help.

My Speaker Page

You are valuable. You can speak up.

Tonya Lehman, The Speaking Confidence Coach 

Helping quiet voices speak up with confidence.

PS.  At this great National Speakers Association SoCal event I was seated next to a very talkative person (hidden behind my head). That's okay - they were very interesting, and I did get a word in by using the technique I share here!  

Self-Promotion Stinks!

Where in the world?

Hello friends,

Working hard behind the scenes is noble.
But being invisible at work? That’s not the goal.

Too often, introverts do incredible work quietly, assuming someone will notice. But if no one hears about your efforts, you could be overlooked for promotions, passed up for projects, or simply underappreciated.

It’s not about bragging.
It’s about owning your worth and letting people know how you’re contributing.

💡 Try this:

Once a week, tell one person one thing you accomplished.
I call it The Rule of One.

This small step makes self-promotion feel doable, not daunting.
It builds your confidence and your visibility—without changing who you are.

Remember, self-promotion isn’t about ego.
It’s about showing up fully—and being proud of what you’ve achieved.

🎥 Watch this short video version if you'd rather hear it straight from me: VIDEO
 

🧭 Need more tools to speak up without burning out?
Click the link to explore resources built especially for introverts:
https://courses.joylab.biz/courses/from-silence-to-strength

You are valuable. You can speak up.

Tonya Lehman, The Speaking Confidence Coach 

Helping quiet voices speak up with confidence.

PS. Do you know where I am? The Smithsonian Museum of American History!

Get Your Nose Out of That Book

Where in the world?

Hello friends,

Ever been told you’re too quiet? Or heard someone say, “You read too much”?

This week’s topic is for my fellow book lovers, especially the introverts who feel misunderstood in a world that praises nonstop socializing.

📚 Get Your Nose Out of That Book Extroverts don’t always understand the joy of sitting quietly, immersed in a story. They might see it as hiding or isolating. But here’s the truth:

👉 Recharging is not a flaw—it's fuel.

👉 Silence is not emptiness—it’s space for thought.

👉 Just because you're quiet doesn’t mean you have nothing to say.

You do have something to say. And when you're ready to speak up, your voice will carry weight. Thoughtful words often do.

I’m often restored by reading a good book in my free time. It helps me process, recharge, and come back stronger.

So, to the people who say, “Don’t you want to go out?” I say, “Yes, after one more chapter.”

🎥 Want to hear me talk about this? Watch the short video version here: https://youtube.com/shorts/HNXqhohl1LI

Your Turn: What’s one book you’ve loved lately? Hit reply or share in the comments—I’m always looking for new reads!

You are valuable. You can speak up.

Tonya Lehman, The Speaking Confidence Coach 

Helping quiet voices speak up with confidence.

PS. Do you recognize where I am?  The Last Bookstore in Los Angeles!